


Where the Precious Goes

by I_am_Silverfish



Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works & Related Fandoms, The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Humor, I'm Sorry Tolkien, Implied Sexual Content, Magical Artifacts, Missing Scene, Other, Rule 34
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-26
Updated: 2016-01-26
Packaged: 2018-05-16 11:39:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5827246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_am_Silverfish/pseuds/I_am_Silverfish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gollum discovers a new place to put the ring.<br/>Or,<br/>The reason the ring chose to leave Gollum when it did.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where the Precious Goes

**Author's Note:**

> Prior to the Peter Jackson movies for The Hobbit, Fanfiction.net did not have any M rated fics for the Hobbit, and because of the saying “if it exists, there’s porn of it on the internet” I decided to rectify the “lack of M rating” situation. This fic was initially posted in www.fanfiction.net, and, while my initial reasons for creating this fic aren't an issue for this archive, I have decided to cross-post this work here anyway. I hope you enjoy it!

            The Ring was not amused. After hundreds of years living happily on Gollum’s finger, Gollum had discovered a new place to put it.

            The Ring’s trouble started when Gollum cut his finger on a sharp rock while hiding from the goblins that inhabited his tunnels surrounding his home. The Ring wasn’t quite sure why Gollum wanted to hide from those “delightful” creatures (who would likely attract his masters attention); but unfortunately the tunnels the goblins inhabited sloped upwards, and without legs The Ring had to rely on gravity to help him roll, and making independent visits with the goblins impossible to accomplish.

            Anyway, Gollum had cut his finger, and still needing to hide from the Goblins, he had slipped The Ring off his normal (and quite comfy) spot, and onto his thumb. Gollum’s thumb, like the thumbs of all known creatures, was a bit thicker than the rest of his fingers; and when Gollum returned to his home away from the goblins and had a moment to think, he realized this fact.

            Normally The Ring sat quite snugly around his finger. It should not have fit around his Thumb.

            “How does it fits us Precious?” Gollum questioned himself. Gollum slid The Ring off of his thumb and held it up to his eye. He noted with surprise that it appeared to have returned to the exact size required to fit on his finger.

            The Ring thought it was being quite obvious about where he wanted to be returned to. After all he was a ring, and while his magic forced him to fit around whatever digit he was placed upon, his favorite place to be was around the slim fingers of his current owner, and the stubby thumb he had been forced onto required him to stretch uncomfortably. Unfortunately, as obvious as The Ring thought he was being, Gollum was oblivious.

            “Will it fits us here?” Gollum asked himself as he slid The Ring into his big toe.

            The Ring was annoyed. Gollum’s feet were quite gross. However, The Ring was bound by its magic to stretch or shrink to fit, and The Ring slipped easily over Gollum’s big toe before shrinking to fit snugly around it.

            Gollum tentatively kicked his foot out to see if The Ring would stay. When The Ring didn’t move, he kicked a bit more vigorously. Once again The Ring stayed snugly around his big toe. Gollum, getting excited about his discovery, stood and did a little jig. The Ring stayed on his toe!

            Suddenly Gollum had a moment of insight. If The Ring stretched to fit his thumb, and stretched to fit his big toe, would The Ring stretch to fit something a bit bigger?

            The Ring picked up Gollum’s excitement and began to dread what he expected would happen next.

            Gollum slipped The Ring off of his big toe and lifted up his loincloth. The Ring knew that what he had dreaded was about to happen. Gollum slipped The Ring, which though unwilling, was bound by magic to fit, onto his penis.

            For the next half hour The Ring tried desperately to block out what was happening, and when Gollum finally took him off to rest, The Ring refused to think about why he needed rest, The Ring took the opportunity to escape.

            The Ring focused all its willpower on rolling the inch required for gravity to bring it down off of the rock it was perched on, and that much closed to the tunnels the goblins lived in. The Ring decided that he did not want to be touched by anyone ever again, and he prayed that no one would find him for a long, LONG time. Suddenly a hand closed around him.

            “Hullo, what’s this?”      


End file.
